Chapter 2: Desire

She's a candle burning in my room

Yeah I'm like the needle, needle and spoon

Over the candle with a shotgun

Pretty soon everybody got one

And the fever when I'm beside her

Desire

Desire

~Desire-U2~

~Edward~



Frantically pacing around my virtually empty dressing room fifteen minutes before we are due to take the stage for the first concert of our European Summer Tour and instead of focusing on the show we are about to put on, I am completely lost in thoughts of Bella. I sit down on the cool leather couch with my elbows on my knees hanging my head down into my hands tugging at my wild, unmanageable hair. How will she act when she sees me? Did I make it clear that I considered this a date? Will she be uncomfortable with the hordes of groupies that will no doubt be coming on to me during the meet and greet after the show? Fuck! I shudder at the thought. I hope to hell that Bella does not feel threatened by a bunch of immoral tramps. She has absolutely nothing to worry about on that accord because I find groupies exceedingly repulsive. I wonder if she would be embarrassed or uncomfortable if I kept her tucked into my side all night. The press will fucking eat that shit up. The ridiculously private, perpetually single, Edward Cullen suddenly flaunting a woman under their noses. I mentally cringe at the thought. We will be splashed all over the internet and gossip rags in a heartbeat.



Before I am able to distress myself any further with this dismal bullshit, our stage manager knocks on my door and gives me the five-minute stage call. Scrubbing my hand over my face, I grab a bottle of water and head to the backstage area to meet the rest of the band. Just as we are about to take the stage, panic surges through me and I realize that I have to warn Bella about the massive media frenzy we will cause if we are photographed together, this has to be her choice. I grab Jacob, the head of our security team, and quickly give him all the information I have regarding Bella, including a description of her. I ask him to bring her straight back to my dressing room after the show rather than taking her to the meet and greet lounge. With a raised eyebrow, he agrees and I finally rush out on stage. Thoughts of my goddess stretched out on my black leather couch waiting for me rush through my mind bringing a half smile to my face. I close my eyes and take a deep breath willing away my painful erection as the opening chords of “Desire” envelope me. A bead of sweat is already running down my neck, disappearing under the collar of my shirt. It is hot as fuck under the stage lights and I am starting to regret wearing the tightest jeans I own. Suddenly, I feel a gentle buzzing sensation in the pit of my stomach and instinctually I know she is there. I open my eyes to scan the VIP area, but it is too dark to see anything clearly. It’s strange, I cannot find her in the crowd but I can feel her presence and any doubts I had before about pursuing a relationship with Bella are squashed in that moment. I don’t know if I believe in fate or destiny or any of that new age bullshit, but I do believe with complete certainty we were meant to find each other, we are meant to be together. I can only hope she feels the same way.



Ninety minutes later, we are finishing our encore and I am suddenly nervous as fuck about seeing Bella again. The unexplainable draw I feel toward her is a little daunting, to say the least, and I am a slightly afraid of the intensity of the feelings I am already experiencing. I mean, Christ I have only known the girl for twenty-four fucking hours. It becomes increasingly evident; however, that I have been irreversibly changed and can no longer return to the cold, heartless bastard I was before I met her.



On my way back to my dressing room I begin to worry about how attached I have already become. What if she is only interested in a fling or worse a one-night stand? The mere thought of that nearly brings me to my knees and I mentally scold myself for acting like such a fucking chick.



I am officially a pussy.



I have never, and I mean never in all of my thirty-five years, seen a woman more than once. I don’t care how tight her pussy is, it’s a one shot deal and they all know it upfront. Don’t get me wrong, It’s not like I’m some kind of whore or anything--well, not anymore anyway, I am simply saying that the women I have previously fucked knew up front what they were getting into; a singular rendezvous with a man who has a very strict set of rules that ensure his status as an uninterested, eternal bachelor. The aforementioned rules I have protected myself with for the past seventeen years are quite simple: first, never give the impression that an encounter could be construed as a date, she must understand that is a purely physical one-time occurrence. Second, never acknowledge a conquest in front of others (discretion is non-negotiable for me). Third, always “meet“ in a neutral and secluded location, I cannot take the risk of being seen. Fourth, never fuck them in a bed (any bed). Fifth, never fuck face-to-face (always from behind, it makes it less personal). Finally, never kiss anywhere near the mouth or face (really anywhere on the head) it is much too intimate.



As I recap my rules, I find that not only have I already broken some of them with Bella, but also that I cannot wait to break the rest of them. Only with her. I want to hold her hand, and kiss her lips, and wake up with her in my bed…in my arms. I want to see her dark shiny hair fanned out across my pillow as she writhes beneath me. I want to watch her beautiful face twist in ecstasy as she comes, calling my name. Only my name.



Shit.



I am so fucked.



With one last deep breath, I open the door to my dressing room. She is sitting on the end of the couch furthest from the door playing with her phone. The soft light coming from the floor lamp is casting a subtle glow to her creamy, pale skin. I walk over to her and offer my hand. She is all teeth and dimples as I pull her to her feet and I can’t help but grin back.



I allow my eyes to rake freely up and down her body. She is wearing a tight black strapless top that clings to her every curve, outlining her full, round tits perfectly. I can see her nipples straining through the fabric and holymotherfuckingchrist I can faintly make out the outline of nipple-rings. I swear the steel rod in my fucking pants is about to bust through the zipper any minute now. I tear my eyes away from her fantastic rack only to find her wearing these ridiculously tight black leather looking pant-legging things, a wide studded belt that accentuates her tiny waist and a pair of sexy as fuck black heels. Her dark hair is straight with her bangs sort of swept over her right eye. Her eyes are smoky and smoldering, her full mouth looks wet and pouty, and I want to lick it….bad.



I hold her right hand up over her head and tug causing her to make a slow turn in front of me. She obliges with a smirk as she turns her back to me. I take a moment to admire the perfection that is her ass noting that it looks even better now than it did in those nonexistent shorts from yesterday. Seriously, these pants are so fucking tight that I’m not quite sure how she fit all that ass into them; they leave absolutely nothing to the imagination. I suck in a sharp breath fighting with every fiber of my being, to resist the urge to rub my dick up against her. As my eyes travel back up her body I notice, for the first time, a group of about eight or nine simple medium sized hibiscus flowers spread out from her left shoulder blade, over her shoulder and down her arm ending just above her elbow. Fuck me. They are in groups of two and three barely touching with no vines or embellishments just filled in with a deep cherry color that contrasts her pale skin perfectly.



I reach out to lightly brush the ink on her shoulder,



“Beautiful” I breathe referring to more than the tattoo.



She turns to gaze up at me and I am rewarded with her sexy smirk.



“I know”



cocky vixen



She darts her eyes curiously around the room. “Where is everyone else?” she asks, her expression changing into one of curiosity.



I reach up to smooth the worry line that has appeared between her perfectly shaped eyebrows while guiding her to sit with me on the couch. I angle my body slightly toward her keeping her hand in mine. I marvel at how soft and small her hand is, and how it is completely engulfed in my large one. It feels like it belongs there, it feels right.



“Well, I sort of wanted to talk to you alone before we join the others for the meet and greet,” I start to explain slowly looking into her eyes to try to gauge her reaction. Her expression remains unreadable so I continue on, “there will be about fifty people there aside from the band, including fans, security and representatives from the media….” I trail off hoping she won’t freak out at the thought of being on the front page of every tabloid and gossip blog known to man by morning. Her eyes harden flashing with anger and hurt and I am shocked by the next words out of her mouth.



“I understand, Edward. You want me to act as if I don’t know who you are. You don’t want to be seen with a nobody. Well, do whatever it is you need to do. Don’t let me ruin your night.” she spats venom oozing from her voice as she rips her hand from mine and stands up from her place on the couch.



“Wait! That’s not what I meant!” I practically yell as I reach out to grab her wrist before she can walk away.



She turns to look at me, her eyes full of questions. “What did you mean then?” she spits out disbelievingly sinking stiffly back down to the couch.



Keeping a firm hold on her hand, I start to clarify, “What I meant…what I brought you in here to explain is that I have never, ever, been seen with a woman before let alone been photographed with one. I am the quintessential bachelor, according to the media, and to be honest, I was okay with that. I welcomed it, in fact, I wanted it that way,” I pause as her eyes drop to the floor and her shoulders hunch slightly in defeat. Hooking my finger under her chin, I gently pull her face up, forcing her eyes to meet mine before I continue. “Until now.” Her breath hitches in her throat and her eyes widen at my confession. I can feel her pulse racing as my hand moves to cup her jaw.



Our eyes lock and the electricity is palpable in the air surrounding us. I slowly lean forward giving her the chance to stop me if this isn’t what she wants. Her eyes drift closed, her lips parting slightly, and I can feel her warm breath on my face as I close the small distance between us. Sparks jolt through my body straight to my dick as I take her full top lip into my mouth sucking slightly. In turn, she sucks on my bottom lip right before I slip my tongue into her mouth. She instantly responds, enthusiastically sucking on it before tangling her own tongue with mine. Thoroughly enjoying the sensation of her tongue-ring clicking against mine, I move to deepen the kiss even further sliding my arms around her waist with my hands finding purchase on her perfect ass. Motherfucking bliss.



I let out a moan as her hands snake their way up into the mess on top of my head. When I pull her body flush with mine grinding my painfully hard cock into her stomach, she whimpers grabbing a fist-full of my hair and pulling hard earning a grunt of appreciation from me.



“Fuck…” I groan as she breaks the kiss.



“Yeah” she breathes a shy dimpled smile lighting up her gorgeous face.



“What was I saying?” I ask like a complete fucking dumbass, my mind still reeling from the best kiss I have ever experienced in my entire godforsaken life. Not that I have much to compare it to, mind you, just a few girls in high school before I became a badass musician and put the rules firmly in place. But, holy fuck, I could kiss Bella forever.



“Uhm, the media…lots of people or something” she answers flippantly, her eyes trained on my lips. She looks stunning, with bright eyes, flushed cheeks and swollen lips.



“Oh yeah, that’s right. I just wanted to give you the opportunity to choose for yourself whether or not you want to walk into that room…as my girl” I pause willing her to understand the clusterfuck her life will become the moment we appear together. “Your whole life will change in that instant and you will not be able to change your mind. You won’t be able to go anywhere anymore. The paparazzi follow you everywhere you go…” I trail off looking down at my scuffed up combat boots unable to look her in the eye if she is about to reject me. I have never felt so fucking vulnerable in my life.



She remains quiet for what seems like an eternity contemplating, I assume what her new life would be like. When I can no longer take the silence, I look up into her big brown eyes. She must see the anguish on my face because her eyes soften as she speaks the words that will change my life forever,



“This is worth it” her voice rings with conviction gesturing between us, “You, are worth it”.



I close my eyes and let out the breath I was holding with relief as she places her little hands on either side of my face,



“I have never felt this way before. I realize that we don’t know very much about each other but it does not change the way I feel. I can’t explain it. I am inexplicably drawn to you…in every way, to the point that I just can’t walk away from you….I don’t want to…it just feels right.” she pulls my face down to hers as she kisses my mouth, “This feels right.”



I capture her lips in another heated kiss losing myself in her scent and her taste, hoping to convey with my lips and tongue that I feel exactly the same way.



We pull apart, both of us panting and I stand and reaching for her hand. Pulling her to her feet, I place one more lingering kiss on her mouth before leading her out to the meet and greet lounge. Lacing my fingers through hers, I look down at her giving her one last chance to back out,



“Are you ready?” I ask right before opening the door that will literally change our lives forever. She just smiles at me and nods tightening her grip on my hand. That is all the confirmation I need.



“Let’s do this shit,” I say with a cocky smirk as I turn the doorknob and step into the lounge pulling Bella along behind me. I try to appear nonchalant while ignoring the gaping looks and pointed stares as we cross the room, headed for the cream-colored leather sofa situated on the opposite wall from the door. I turn back to smile reassuringly at Bella hearing the photogs snapping their cameras furiously, capturing the first ever pictures of Edward Cullen with a female companion. The media that are allowed backstage are under a strict contract that ensures nothing that is seen or heard backstage can be repeated or written about. They are only allowed to take and publish photos…period, but they still make me nervous.



I can feel the waves of anxiety rolling off her by the time we finally reach the couch. I situate myself on the unoccupied end pulling her down beside me. I drape my right arm around her shoulders and turn my head to press a gentle kiss to her temple. She reaches up to twine our fingers together leaning in to burry her face in my neck. I turn my head toward her just about to inhale her warm sweet scent when I feel the sharp pinch of her little teeth scraping along the underside of my jaw and holy hell it feels so fucking good.



It is at this moment that I realize that the room is completely silent and heavy with tension. Everyone is gaping at us in disbelief. I can understand their shock though; no one has ever seen me so much as acknowledge a woman in front of the media so to suddenly see me openly affectionate with Bella must be an astonishing.



Aside from the media representatives, my two band mates, their significant others and two members of our security team are present. Resolving that this is the moment of truth; I take a deep breath and look down at my beautiful girl before I start introductions.



“The blonde guy in the beige chair is Jasper, he plays bass and guitar. The little sprite in his lap is Alice, his girlfriend. The two big fuckers over by the door are Embry and Quill they are part of our security team, Jacob and Jared are outside with the VIP’s. ...you will meet them in a moment. This motherfucker right here, taking up half the goddamn couch is Emmett, he plays the drums,” I say shoving his shoulder. “And the woman sitting next to him is his wife, Rosalie.” I finish off quickly.



Bella’s eyes follow to each person, assessing them, as I introduce each one. She smiles tentatively at everyone and gives a small wave. The group smiles back at her, all except for Rosalie of course. Bitch. She is seething with jealousy. I snicker internally at her audacity to show such blatant resentment in front of her husband. I still have no idea what it is that he sees in her. He insists that she has redeeming qualities, but all I see is a self-centered, manipulative, gold-digging whore. Rosalie Hale (she insisted on keeping her maiden name…whatever) thinks she is God’s gift to men with her five-foot ten-inch frame, bleached blonde hair and ice blue eyes. And I suppose to some men she is. To me, however, she is all fake tans, fake tits and fake smiles; I wouldn’t touch that shit with someone else’s dick and she knows it. I know what women like Rosalie Hale are after….case in point, my boy Emmett. She followed our third U.S. tour around for six cities trying to land me, after the sixth outright rejection however, she finally settled for him. Stupid fucker. She still to this day, as down right rude as I am to her, occasionally propositions me. And I, still to this day, tell her to back her nasty shit the fuck off.



“Everyone, this is my Bella”



As the gang all calls out their acknowledgements, I look down to my goddess noting that she is eyeing Rosalie suspiciously. She looks up at me from under her long, thick lashes and my overeager body instantly reacts. Leaning down I press my lips against hers with enough force to slightly tilt her head back. Her lips answer my kiss eagerly moving hungrily in rhythm with mine. I vaguely hear gasps and a distinct choking sound in the background, but am not surprised. They are all well aware of my “rules“ so I’m sure they are all freaking out.



A sharp rap at the door pulls us from our impromptu make-out session and in a flash, the room is filled with VIPs. The multitude of half-naked groupies are giggling, of course, while making every effort to impress in hopes of gaining attention from any of us guys. Nothing short of a miracle, however, could pull my attention away from the vixen at my side. Bella crosses her long slender legs and burrows down deeper into my side settling her left hand on my thigh while she scrutinizes the group of women emerging through the door. I chuckle at her blatant show of possessiveness while threading my hand into the hair at the back of her head and pulling gently in response. Her eyes slide over to me and she tilts her head slightly to the side, an invitation I eagerly take. I suck on her pulse point before biting down hard enough to leave a mark then run my tongue over it to soothe the flesh. I pull back while pushing her hair across her opposite shoulder to admire my handiwork before planting a quick wet kiss to her lips. I stare pointedly at Jared, whose gaze has not left Bella’s lips since he entered the room. That’s right motherfucker; she is mine lips and all. Who knew I had caveman tendencies?



Bella shoots straight to her feet with a huge grin on her face, pulling me with her, as a young couple approaches us. The guy is tall, around six feet I’d say, with a lanky build. He has dark hair cropped close to his head and Bella’s eyes. The girl he is with is also pretty tall, standing about five-seven, and appears to be of Native American decent with her long dark hair, high cheekbones and russet colored skin.



I feel her tiny hand slip into mine as she speaks, “This is my brother, Seth and his girlfriend Sam.” She gestures to the couple before turning her head to face me. “And this” She continues, blushing slightly as she places her hand on my chest, “is my Edward.” My heart swells at her words. I have always believed it would be deplorable to have someone label me as theirs, but the opposite is true in Bella’s case. I am fucking elated.



I give her a quick wink before turning to Seth and Sam, “It’s a pleasure to meet you both, thank you for coming out to support Bella tonight. It can be quite unnerving to be thrust into the spotlight like this.” I said gesturing to where the media was grouped together while sliding my arm around Bella’s waist pulling her firmly into my side. She fits perfectly under my arm, her curves molding into my body like corresponding puzzle pieces.



“Not a problem” Seth answers winking at Bella.



A shriek from the opposite side of the room catches our attention and we all turn our heads to see what the commotion is about. In a flash Leah, Jacobs wife, is across the room in Sam’s arms. It turns out they are long lost friends who grew up together in La Push, a reservation in a small town in Washington State. I learn that Bella’s father and Jacob’s father are the best of friends out there as well. It’s great chatting with them, hearing about all the shenanigans Jacob got into when he was a kid, since he is the person I trust the most outside of my family and the band. It is nice to find a common ground where Bella does not feel like an outsider in our group.



Before I know it, Alice has stolen her away to mingle with the crowd, leaving me alone with Emmett and Jasper nursing my scotch. I watch Bella as she moves gracefully between groups chatting casually amongst the VIPs. She looks so natural in this setting and I realize that she is what has been missing from my life all along. She throws her head back and laughs exuberantly at something Alice has said then turns to look coyly at me over her shoulder. The expression on her face stirs something in my gut I don’t quite understand.



Damn she is beautiful.



Emmett’s loud, obnoxious laugh brings me out of my reverie, “Dude, you’ve got it bad.” Jasper snickers along with him. Bastard.



“Fuck you” I spit out narrowing my eyes at him.



He holds up his hands in surrender, “Chill, bro. I don’t blame you. She fuckin’ hot, if I didn’t have Rosie, I’d totally tap that.” then the asshole has the gall to turn and address Jasper, “Did you see the ass on her?”



I glare at them disbelievingly as Jasper nods in appreciation adding, “Lips too”.



“Shut. The. Fuck. Up!” I seethe, pointing at the assholes “I’m warning you, motherfuckers”



Emmett just laughs in response before conceding, “Naw, we’re just joking assfuck. We’re really happy for you. She is hot though” he gives me a pointed stare, “and young”.



“I know, I know. She’s old enough though” I smirk at them before throwing back my drink. Jasper raises his eyebrow in challenge. “Fuck…she’s twenty, okay?” I snap exasperated. “I’m not a fucking idiot”



Thankfully, they let the subject of Bella’s age drop. “So,” Jasper starts “you gonna bring her along on tour?”



“Yeah, I mean I hope so. I’m planning to ask her to attend the MTV Movie Awards with me also.” I reply before lighting a cigarette.



“That’s a big step…,” he cautions, while refilling our drinks.



“I know” I assure him “I can’t really explain it though, it’s like magnets or fate or some shit. Now that I found her I don’t think I could let her go.” I say swirling the scotch in my glass before downing it.



When I look at him, he just nods his head. I knew that Jasper, of all people would understand how I feel. He met Alice backstage after a show in Mississippi about five years ago, she went home with him that night and dropped everything the following day to finish out the tour with him, they have been very happy together ever since.



Just as I am putting out my cigarette, Rosalie comes sauntering over to us with her slutty sister Tanya in tow. Rose settles herself down in Emmett’s lap while Tanya sits on the arm of the couch closest to me.



“Hey handsome, you look lonely, I‘d be happy to keep you company.” Tanya’s shrill voice rings out next to my ear while she reaches out to run one of her hot-pink talons down my chest. It’s not that Tanya is ugly per se; she looks a lot like Rosalie, fake tits and all, only with strawberry blonde hair. It’s just that she is dirty and fake and she has fucked nearly all of our road crew and is currently trying to work her way through our security team all while still, after countless rejections, trying to get in my pants. Fucking Gross. Some people just don’t understand the meaning of the word no.



“Don’t fucking touch me.” I snarl, glaring at her before turning my head away. I am pissed at her complete fucking lack of respect for my girl. “It’s never gonna happen.”



Bella appears a moment later plopping herself sideways into my lap virtually shoving Tanya out of the way while planting a scorching kiss on my lips. I open my mouth practically shoving my tongue down her throat while trailing my hand up the outside of her thigh grabbing a handful of flesh where her thigh meets her ass. She winds her arms around my neck, threading her fingers into my hair, scratching and pulling as I suck on her tongue, swallowing her moans before moving to her neck and biting down again creating a twin for the mark I made earlier. Fucking Neanderthal. I lick the mark before planting a wet, sloppy kiss on her sexy mouth.



“I sincerely hope you don’t plan on making a habit out of this, “Rosalie sneers, gesturing distastefully to Bella. “I would hate to have to entertain each and every one of your conquests going forward.” she finishes, her voice dripping with animosity.



I snap my head to glare at the bitch, “Watch it Rosalie,” I warn in a low threatening voice. “Bella is now a part of this group,” I declare, “Permanently” Out of the corner of my eye I notice Bella smirk.



Rosalie’s eyes widen in shock at my declaration but instead of backing off, she continues with her taunts, “Is she even old enough to drink, Edward?” she goads while rolling her eyes. I feel Bella stiffen in my lap, but before I have a chance to respond, she retorts, “I apologize if my age makes you uncomfortable Rosalie, I will try to keep my distance.” Rosalie looks smug and I am about to rip in to her when Bella continues, “It’s understandable that you wouldn’t want a constant reminder of your lost youth. You know, my mom has a really good doctor in Jacksonville that administers her Botox, I’d be happy to give you his name and number because whoever it is that you are using, is causing your facial expressions to look strange. I think it’s because your eyebrows don’t move. Gosh, I can’t even imagine the day when I will need that stuff….I still have quite a while though…” she trails off with the sweetest smile on her face.



I am fucking speechless. Everyone is speechless and Rosalie is fuming. No female has ever put Rosalie in her place, but Bella did it flawlessly and believe me, it was sexy as hell. I have never been more turned on in my entire life. I want to throw her down on the couch in front of everybody and claim her. Although I know the conflict between them is far from over, I am so fucking proud of her for not being intimidated. I lean down to burry my face in the hair behind Bella’s ear and whisper to her,



“Stay with me tonight”



She pulls back to look into my eyes as she considers my request. I can see the conflict reflecting back in her own.



“I promise to be a gentleman,” I plead while running my hand through the silky strands of her hair. She closes her eyes and tilts her head back as I gently pull, exposing her long graceful neck. I lean in and gently nibble on the mark I left earlier before going in for the kill.



“Please, baby” I whisper in her ear before taking the lobe in my mouth, grazing my teeth over it.



“Yes” she breathes as I go back to work on her neck. Knowing we are getting a bit inappropriate to be in the company of others, I mutter, “Let’s go” standing up from the couch and setting her on her feat. With one last smug look at the others, who are still gaping at us, I wind my fingers through hers and lead her out the door.